A reminder from your childhood

What did you want to be when you grew up?

When I was a kid, I loved basketball. So much so, in fact, that my dream was to become a professional basketball player.

Back in those days, I owned that dream. I didn’t think it was ridiculous, or out there, or impossible. It was just what I wanted.

As I got older, though, I gradually let go of my dream (not just because, as it turned out, I wasn’t actually that great at the sport 😂). 

But because I felt like I had no choice but to give it up. 

As I approached high school and then college, the message I got from the world was that it was time to be real. To get practical. To be serious – an adult. 

So, I got in line.

I’m betting you had a dream like this, too. A crazy, out there, special, totally “un-serious” dream. And I bet it felt true and right to you.

When did you give it up? Why?

When I traded my dream for the practical seriousness of adulthood, I thought I was being smart and getting a good deal.

Turns out that trade was very costly.

What I gained in other people’s approval, I lost in personal fulfillment.

What I gained in the supposed clarity of a safer path, I lost in authenticity.

Choosing seriousness cost me the opportunity to pursue a dream that fulfilled me.

And for a very long time I thought I’d lost those things forever.

A while back a friend came to me to ask for my advice on his career path. Someone had suggested he reflect on his dreams and talents as a kid to identify what he might do for work as an adult.

“I wanted to be a pro basketball player,” I said, laughing off his theory.

But then we went a bit deeper. 

We talked about what I actually loved about basketball. How I loved playing the sport, but what I really loved was the team. 

I loved supporting and coaching my teammates, helping them spot their talents and deepen their strengths.

I loved being a part of something bigger than me: choreographing and analyzing each play, and feeling alive when we were in sync and working together towards a common goal. 

“Ohmygod,” I thought – “This is completely how I have built my business. This IS what I do for work.”

And it truly feels like my dream job.

Today, consider what you loved when you were a kid. What were your wishes for yourself when you were young, before you learned to be serious?

Then, ask yourself:

• What was it about those activities that brought out a feeling of aliveness or fulfillment in you?

• Where might you infuse moments of fun, imagination, creativity or dreaming into your serious world of adulthood? And importantly, why?

I’d love to hear what you think. Send me a note and let me know?

Onward,

PS: If you’re feeling ready to redesign your career for more fulfillment, fun, or meaning – let’s talk. I’ve recently updated my coaching offerings (see the overview here). Maybe one of them is right for you?